Wow, you see that number 100 at the top of this post? Man, I’ve been around a while, haven’t I? And in honor of my 100th post, Ima give you 10 of the dumbunniest jokes I can remember. After all, I don’t wanna wear myself out. Yeah, I know 10’s got nothing to do with 100, but no way I’m gonna look for 100 jokes. Wait, let me show you my last 100 dunk attempts. Oh yeah, luckily no one was around to record them.
THE TEN ONE-LINERS DELIVERED TO YOU BY DR. CRANKENFUSS
1) A termite goes into a bar. He asks, “Is the bartender here?” (Okay, a few of you might need to think about this one.)
2) A man sent his depressed friend ten puns to see if he could make his friend laugh. No pun in ten did.
3) How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
4) An invisible man married an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
5) Did you hear about the restaurant they opened up on the space station? Great food, but no atmosphere.
6) Parent says, “My kid texts me ‘plz’ because it’s shorter than ‘please.’ I text him back ‘No’ because it’s shorter than ‘Yes.’
7) Two antennae got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.
8) Woman goes to a psychiatrist. Says, “Doctor, sometimes I dream I’m a wigwam. Then I dream I’m a teepee. Then a wigwam. Then a teepee. Over and over and over again. It’s driving me crazy. Help me, Doctor!”
Psychiatrist says, “Calm down. You’re too tense.”
9) What did the surgeon say to the guy who came in with no health insurance? “Okay, suture self.”
10) Here’s one my science teacher told the class. About half the people got it.
Neutron walks in a bar, orders a drink. Bartender says, “For you, no charge.”
You figured out Number 3 yet?
From Your Dude with the ‘Tude (and 100 genius blog posts),
P.S. You’re still trying to figure out Number 3, aren’t you?