Today, I’m kind of steamed, just like my picture at the left shows me. Hey, I know that’s not unusual, but it’s just that I actually like to learn stuff and sometimes that learning actually takes place at school. It really does. But not lately. Our math and English teachers keep giving us these practice tests for the EOG tests, (That’s End-of-Grade Tests, where they supposedly measure how much we’ve learned.) But we’re not learning anything from these practice tests except how to take the tests. Hey, I already know how to take the tests. Yeah, it might help some students. If they listened. But I don’t think they are.
Anyway, I put it all into a poem. I didn’t learn anything from the poem — me being the author and all — but maybe it’ll get my idea across better.
STOP MESSING WITH OUR TESTING
by Dr. Crankenfuss
It’s getting near that time of year
When schools try to measure our progress,
But the method they use just gives us the blues.
It’s not accurate; it’s really just dog mess.
What makes someone smart? What sets us apart?
They ought to give us some problems,
Then examine our thinking, be it amped or stinking,
And see if we’re able to solve them.
Instead they give us a multiple choice test,
They don’t even know if we’ve read it,
We can just have a fling, fill in anything,
And we’re sure to get partial credit.
What about assessing our creativity,
Or gauging our determination?
Spotting leadership ability,
Or skills in communication?
Schools know how important test results are,
How they affect our hopes and dreams,
So who do they put in charge of our future?
A bunch of grading machines.
These tests hurt kids; they get discouraged,
And then our schools can lose them.
If the tests are so great, why are we
The only country to use them?
We all want to learn, so please engage us,
Don’t just “teach to the test.”
If machines are to be our evaluators,
How can we achieve success?
From Your Dude with the ‘Tude,