Wanna do damage to your heart?/ Get in a line at Costco with three things in your cart.

Post #169 from Dr. Crankenfuss, The World’s Awesomest Raving and Rapping middle school blogger–

Okay, we’re at the local Costco, okay. Great store overall! Where else can I buy a like a 60-pound bag of chocolate bars for the price of a 3-pound bag in a regular grocery store? And their $5 roasted-on-a-spit chickens are bigger than most turkeys. Okay, I exaggerate, but they really are big. But they have one problem that’s even bigger than their roasted chickens (or those bagsĀ of chocolate).

See, I was there with my mom — seeing as how I don’t exactly drive yet — and we only had about three items in our cart, including that chicken and not including that bag of chocolate I was begging for. And we get to the cash registers and here the problem begins.

The lines were H-U-G-E!! And even though we only had three freakin’ things in our cart, it still took us like 15 minutes to get through the line. Not fair, y’all.

Why isn't there an express lane at Costco or Sam's? I ask you, people?
Why isn’t there an express lane at Costco or Sam’s? I ask you, people?

Oy!! Look at that monster cart to the left of the picture. That’s about a month’s worth of food. And that was ahead of us! A-y-y-y!

And yes, I went to the supervisor’s desk or whatever it’s called and asked (really politely at first) why they didn’t have an express line and they gave the same old line they gave me last time — that other people had asked the same question and that they had told the higher-ups at their headquarters, but there was nothing they could do about it. In fact, the lady told me that it wouldn’t be fair for someone with fewer items to get ahead because this way everybody was dealt with “in order.”

Huh? What could be so hard about doing something that every grocery store has figured out? Hey, I saw one guy there with ONE THING in his cart — a 20 roll container of toilet paper — man, he must have been in some trouble — and he had to wait just like all of us. I bet he didn’t even make it to his bathroom in time.

And for those of you out there who thinks SAM’S has a better system, THEY DON’T. So come on, you giant warehouse retailers. Give your customers who don’t need a truck full of stuff a chance to get through the lines faster. P-L-E-A-S-E!!

Just a simple request
that I’ve already discussed,
An idea whose time has come
from Dr. Crankenfuss

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