Humor Post #75 from the world’s Crankiest Curmudgeon’s Middle School Blog (and probably the awesomest YA blog too) –

Crankenfuss is CRANKY, people. He can’t think o’ nuttin’ to complain about today. What the heck is the world coming to? Well, actually I could, but I don’t wanna. I think I’ll be positive for a change. So today I’m giving you 10 of the dumbest things anybody has ever said. I found these all over the web and I made sure I found every one of them at least twice. That’s the best I can do to find out if they’re true. I could try to contact everyone quoted, but some of them are dead, the others don’t know me, and I’m pretty sure nobody’s going to write back to some twit who’s asking them, “Are you as stupid as this quote makes you look?” and say, “Oh yeah, I said that. I’m as dumb as a rock who gets F’s in rock school.”

And even if these quotes (and the people who said them) are pretty pathetic, at least you can say, “Hey, my life ain’t so bad.” At least I’m not as dumb as this knuckle-dragger.”

So here they are in no particular order, ten really dumb quotes:
1) “We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.” (Jason Kidd when he was first drafted out of college to the NBA)
2) “The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It’s only the people who make them unsafe.” (Frank Rizzo, the dumb mayor of Philadelphia a long time ago)
3) “Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.” (Brooke Shields, actress)
4) “Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.” (Marion Barry, another dumb mayor, but this time of Washington, D.C.)
5) “I’m keeping an eye out for those Americans.” (Osama bin Laden. Actually, I just made that one up. Pretty good, if I do say so myself.)
6) “Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?” (President George W. Bush, talking about education)
7) “Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.” (Joe Theismann, former star NFL quarterback, but he was no Norman Einstein)
8) “I’ve been up and down so many times that I feel as if I’m in a revolving door.” (Cher, famous singer and actress)
9) “I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix.” (former Vice-president Dan Quayle. There’s lots of dumb quotes on the web by him. Some of them gotta be true, wouldn’t you think?)
10) “I wished the buck did stop here. I could use a few.” (Dr. Crankenfuss, world renowned sage. Okay, I admit I stole this one, but I really did make up #6.)

That’s it for today, oh posse of mine.
Till later, it’s your Dude with the ‘Tude,
Dr. Crankenfuss