Tag Archives: free ebooks

Freak Speak

OUR RADIO AD FOR “LOVE THUG” (free this Wed-Fri, July 10-12)

Leave a comment

Okay, first off, if you’re here just for the radio ad, it’s at the bottom, okay? But then come back and get the lowdown on it. I’m worth it.

See,I’m Dr. Crankenfuss and I’m the ranting, raving, and rapping middle schooler who lives in Daniel Berenson’s head. (He’s the guy who runs FREAKY DUDE BOOKS.) It’s not that bad really cause there’s a lot of room up here and I like the freedom Daniel gives me. I often like to make fun of Daniel cause he’s kind of easy to make fun of, but today I’m here to praise Daniel, not to bury him.

See, Daniel has this book at Amazon called LOVE THUG. It’s a romantic comedy for kids. Yeah, you heard me right. And it’s funny too. They’ve even used it at schools in Raleigh and Durham, North Carolina. You can read all about it at its Amazon page. It’s got great reviews and everything.

But let me get to the good part. It’s FREE July 10-12 — that’s Wednesday through Friday — at Amazon. On those days, just go to its page, click on the Buy Button and it’s all yours. For absolutely nothing.

But even free books need good ads. That’s what gets people to check them out. So Daniel got on the computer and cooked up this radio ad. It’s really pretty good. (I always tell him he has a good face for radio.) He says next time he’ll get James Earl Jones to do the talking. I mean, when Darth Vader tells you to get something, you get it, right?

So here it is. Listen to it and on Wednesday, Thursday, or Friday, go get LOVE THUG at Amazon. It’ll be worth every penny you spend.

Freak Speak

DON’T BUY “LOVE THUG.” WHY NOT? BECAUSE IT’LL BE FREE ON WED-FRI (JULY 10-12)

Leave a comment

News from the world’s Awesomest & Crankiest Curmudgeon’s Middle School and YA Blog –

Usually I refer to my posts as humor posts because, as you well know, they’re funny. Not this one! This one is serious and if you listen to me, you’ll save money. Not a whole lot, mind you. A whole $2.99. But that’s not chicken feed for someone my age. So get ready to get smart.

ATTENTION, ALL PEOPLE!
(And that means you too!)

DON’T BUY LOVE THUG!
DON’T BUY LOVE THUG!
DON’T BUY LOVE THUG!

Why not??? Because it’s going to be
FREE AT AMAZON JULY 10-12 (WED-FRI).

If you don’t know LOVE THUG, it’s a very funny book. You can read all about it at LOVE THUG’s page at Amazon. Check out those reviews. Read a few pages. That’s all it’ll take to convince you the book is worth every penny you’ll spend when it’s free. Now this is normally not an expensive book. Hey, a Big Mac costs more. But wouldn’t you rather get a Big Mac for free than paying for it?

I’ll say it again (in case you don’t read too good or have ADD like me).
On Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, Daniel’s having a big sale.
LOVE THUG will be FREE on those days (July 10-12).
So hold off for a few days, then come to Amazon and get it for NOTHING!

And Daniel told me to tell you if you don’t like the book,
he’ll refund all the money you spent!

Funny guy, that Daniel.
NOT!

Just trying to help.

From Your Dude with the ‘Tude,
Dr. Crankenfuss

Freak Speak

Dr. Crankenfuss’s Poem for Weekend Writing Warriors

2 Comments

Okay, we’ve been gone a while but it’s time for me — that’s Dr. Crankenfuss — to post a poem that will eventually be in my book, which will come out in about a year. IF I CAN BELIEVE DANIEL! Anyway, I’m presenting it as this week’s Sunday Snippet for Weekend Writing Warriors. Be sure to visit the Warrior site and look through all the stuff writers post there. A lot of interesting reading for sure.

So here’s my poem. But first I have to explain why I wrote it.

See, I wrote a post with a poem that was entitled Books Are Evil. They’re Killing Us. Let’s Ban Books! Click here to read it if you want. Daniel posted the poem at a few places including LinkedIn and I got some replies. Some were nice and agreed with me. Others weren’t so nice. For one thing, people told me my love for iPads and Kindles was wrong because they were made in China by workers who made about $1 a day. So I did some investigating on my own and this is what I found out.

TABLETS AND OTHER STUFF WE NEED AND LIKE A LOT
by Dr. Crankenfuss

I don’t understand it,
What can I say?
Almost nothing I own’s
Made in the USA.

My shoes come from Vietnam or China,
Calvin Klein’s made in Hong Kong,
Almost the only thing I have not from the far East
Is a polyester shirt from Oman.

India, Korea, Pakistan,
Don’t matter if it’s for a woman or a man,
I don’t know what happened to all the US workers,
Must be they’re all frying fast food burgers.

So I guess to be fair I should give up my iPad,
Its workers are exploited and somehow that’s my bad,
I could read paper books printed here I suppose
But shouldn’t I also learn to live without clothes?

******************************************************************
Thank you to Weekend Writing Warriors and now it’s time for my usual rant.
******************************************************************

News from the world’s Awesomest & Crankiest Curmudgeon’s Middle School and YA Blog –

Listen to me, people!
DON’T BUY LOVE THUG!
DON’T BUY LOVE THUG!
DON’T BUY LOVE THUG!

Why not??? Because it’s going to be
FREE AT AMAZON JULY 10-12 (WED-FRI).

If you don’t know LOVE THUG, it’s a very funny book. You can read all about it at LOVE THUG’s page at Amazon. There you’ll see the price is $2.99. Now $2.99 ain’t much. Hey, a Big Mac costs more. But you can get an even better deal than that.

On Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, Daniel’s having a big sale.
LOVE THUG will be FREE on those days (July 10-12).
So hold off for a few days, then come and get it for NOTHING!

And Daniel told me to tell you if you don’t like the book,
he’ll refund all the money you spent!

Funny guy, that Daniel.
NOT!

Just trying to help.

From Your Dude with the ‘Tude,
Dr. Crankenfuss