Post #8 from Kidlit’s Crankiest Curmudgeon’s Blog–

Okay people, I know I’m all full of myself and all and I like to complain/whine/moan/kvetch, you name it, but I’m always right, which makes my rants justified. But you know all that already, don’t you? But tonight, I have a different “concern” and this one concerns all of us, but especially kids in school. I guess I’ll have to put it to the only guy who can actually change it for the better. So here goes:

Dear God,
I’m only a regular — actually better than regular, but you know that — kid in North Carolina and usually I don’t ask you for much. I mean, I know life isn’t fair and all that and you’ve set it all up the way you want, but I just have a little request, not for just me, you understand, but for millions of people like me. See, around this time of year, daylight savings time ends and that means that around 5 o’clock, like whoa, it gets too dark to see the basket very well and my shots keep missing, but it’s not all my fault, you know, cause how can anyone expect me to score when I can’t see? It’s not the cold weather that gets to me — hey, I can play shirts and skins in a snowstorm, though I have to admit I’d rather be a shirt — but this daylight thing is a real hindrance. Now I know we could go back to daylight savings, but that wouldn’t work either because then I’m waking up and it’s still dark. Not good. Just a couple weeks ago I smashed my toe on the bathroom scale cause I couldn’t see anything and it was already past six in the morning. Now I’m not blaming you, you understand, but it really did hurt.

So here’s my humble suggestion. Can’t you just tilt the Earth just a tad different or maybe let the sun move around as much as is necessary to keep daylight hours a little more even? It wouldn’t be that hard for you and think how much kids would appreciate it. I can’t speak for all the adults but I have the feeling that a little more regularity would be appreciated by all.

As I said, this is only a suggestion. Maybe I don’t get it all and it would be impossible but — oh yeah, I just thought of this — think of how hard it must be for kids in Alaska who have to live in the darkness for months every winter. Man, how are their dads going to kill any moose for dinner if they can’t see? I’m sure there must be others who’d agree with me, but anyway, just give it some thought, okay?

Thank you for listening.

From one of your biggest fans,
Dr. Crankenfuss (I know you know who I am, but this is for my readers. I’m sure you understand.)