Post #148 from Dr. Crankenfuss, The World’s Awesomest Raving and Rapping blogger —

You like how I look today? I thought so. But there’s a reason for it, and it probably saved my life. See, it was school spirit day and I bought this rainbow head wig online — my mom was so happy — to show my school spirit. It has red in it, so I figured it would be perfect since our school colors are red and white. To get the white, I wore a white shirt and hey, my skin’s sort of pasty and white, so there you go. Mr. School Spirit!

So I’m walking down the hall between classes, all full of myself, and this tall — and I do mean TALL, he must have been on the basketball team (for college!) — guy cuts in front of me and I trip over my own shoes and almost fall. “Nice move, cigarette head!” I said, referring to his l-o-n-n-g-g lanky head. Under my breath, I thought.

WRONG! He heard me and picked me up off the ground by my shoulders and put me against the wall. “You say something, punk?” he asked (and not sweetly either).

“No, no,” I protested. “I was praising you. I said, ‘Nice move to to get ahead.’ He thought for a second and let me down. “Okay,” he said, “but don’t try any funny stuff with me, okay?”

I had no trouble agreeing with him.

Now how this rainbow wig will save me is this. As soon as this was over, I ducked into the bathroom and took it off. He probably won’t recognize me without it. And he probably didn’t see my shirt (with my super-cool slogan on it) because he was looking me straight in the face. Believe me, I know, because our eyes never went away from each other.

See, school is full of education AND adventure. My education for the day was to promise myself to keep the insults that come from my mouth away from the ears of dangerous guys. Best lesson I had all day, maybe all month.

Glad to be alive,
Your Dude with the more careful ‘Tude,
Dr. Crankenfuss

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That’s it
My message is done
Now I’ll go back
And eat that onion.

Dr. C